Happy Sunday,The call gets bumped again. An hour. By the time we talk, my talking points have gone stale, and my patience went with them. I know the script that plays in my head. Disrespectful. Inconsiderate. Doesn’t value my time. The frustration feels righteous. Feels earned. And then the counter floats up: I never said a word. Six reschedules and not once did I say, “Two bumps max, then we find a new day together.” We did talk. It was productive. I shared what I needed to say. They’re empathetic. Encouraging. Said the right things. A week later, actions haven’t matched words. And the loop starts again. And to be fair, that’s how it should look from their side. I never drew the line. I never named what I needed. I journaled about it. Named it in scribbled pages. Let it sit there. Awareness without teeth. I’m learning the frustration isn’t with the other person. Not really. It’s my loop. Coming from a vague contract I wrote in my head. Never spoken. Every time I swallowed an irritation instead of naming it, I was entering into an agreement the other person didn’t know existed. Building a case out of evidence they couldn’t see. Getting annoyed when they broke rules that neither of us expressly agreed to. The boundary between me and myself is missing. Not other people. My real problem is deciding what’s worth protecting. Then speaking up before the resentment says it for me. People assume yes until you say no. And silence doesn’t keep the peace as much as it defaults to you carrying the weight.
March in 3 snapshots 🎮 Warframe with JBott & friends — been playing Warframe on my phone, but it’s barely a phone game at this point. Streaming it to my laptop, TV, even the projector, controller in hand. The whole setup feels slightly ridiculous and very cool. Also a nice way to socialize instead of just saying I will. 🐉 King Sorrow in four days — First book of 2026. I owe Bubbs the credit. He handed it to me and said “I think you’ll like it,” which is all the motivation I need to read 900 pages. Good book with some disappointments. Which, honestly, is a fair review of most things worth finishing. Not everything has to be a 10 to be worth your time. 🏙️ Shows in the city — pushed myself to leave home after dark. Saw Geoffrey Asmus’ stand up comedy set. And went to Project Hail Mary in IMAX. Best movie-going experience I’ve had this decade. Both nights reminded me it’s nice to get out and be where the people are.
3 Lessons Learned I. Future plans are a privilege. When you’re worried about your job, your rent, or next month, you don’t think far ahead. You stay close to the present. You have to. The moment you can plan three, six, twelve months out, something underneath is steady. That’s easy to miss. Don’t. Looking ahead means right now is working. II. Value is subjective and best understood in contrast. The same thing can feel expensive or obvious depending on who’s looking at it. If they can do it themselves, it’s a pass. If they can’t, it matters. Value isn’t in the thing. It shows up in what someone needs. Make that clear, and the price takes care of itself. III. Drilling holes is an exercise in change. Drilling into the wall feels like a real commitment. You’re choosing something and accepting you might deal with it later. That hesitation shows up everywhere. At home. At work. In your relationships. Change starts with the thing you keep avoiding. Accept the mess. Drill the hole.
3 fun things to check out
I’ll leave you with a quote 🤔 “Think lightly of yourself and deeply of the world.” — Miyamoto Musashi Until next time, Scotty
|
